I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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