it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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