3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.