it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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