"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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