I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Jerry, you need to find god
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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