i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
