So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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