24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
