Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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