Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
