P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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