He passed out mid-signature
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
