windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize