Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Randomize
