Say something about gay babies.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
