that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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