Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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