so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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