It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
