So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
3 2 1 whiskey
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
