? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.