Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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