She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just high enough for therapy.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize