I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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