All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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