I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
