im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Houston, we have a squirter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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