he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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