Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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