I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Randomize
