I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed