I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
