You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
