idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
