he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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