Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
