I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Randomize