i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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