im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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