he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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