I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I think my vagina is haunted
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
All I want is dick and wine.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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