why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
