How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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