Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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