Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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