I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
