in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
