how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
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