I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
